Ex- England skipper Lewis Moody has announced he has been diagnosed with motor neurone disease and acknowledged he cannot yet deal with the full consequences of the muscle-deteriorating condition that took the lives of fellow rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow.
The 47-year-old athlete, who was involved in the 2003 championship side and won multiple English and European titles with Leicester, appeared on BBC Breakfast two weeks after learning he has the disease.
"There's an element of confronting what lies ahead and hesitating to really process that at the moment," he commented.
"This doesn't mean I fail to comprehend where it's going. We comprehend that. But there is certainly a unwillingness to confront the future for now."
Moody, talking with his wife Annie, says conversely he feels "calm" as he directs his attention to his present health, his family and making preparations for when the condition deteriorates.
"Perhaps that's shock or perhaps I deal with matters uniquely, and after I have the information, it's simpler," he stated further.
Initial Signs
Moody learned he had MND after noticing some weakness in his upper arm while training in the gym.
After physical therapy didn't help the problem, a set of scans revealed neural pathways in his central nervous system had been affected by MND.
"You're given this medical finding of MND and we're appropriately quite emotional about it, but it's rather peculiar because I sense that I'm perfectly healthy," he continued.
"I don't experience unwell. I don't feel unwell
"My symptoms are quite slight. I have a bit of muscle wasting in the fingers and the shoulder region.
"I continue to be capable of accomplishing all activities. And with luck that will persist for as long as is attainable."
Disease Advancement
MND can advance quickly.
As per the non-profit MND Association, the disease kills a one-third of people within a 365 days and above half within 730 days of detection, as ingestion and inhalation become increasingly challenging.
Therapy can only delay deterioration.
"It isn't ever me that I experience sorrow for," commented an moved Moody.
"It's about the sadness around having to tell my mum - as an sole offspring - and the implications that has for her."
Household Effect
Speaking from the residence with his wife and their pet dog by his side, Moody was consumed with feeling when he discussed breaking the news to his sons - teenage Dylan and 15-year-old Ethan - the heartbreaking news, stating: "That represented the most difficult thing I've ever had to do."
"They're two brilliant boys and that was pretty devastating," Moody stated.
"We positioned ourselves on the sofa in weeping, Ethan and Dylan both wrapped up in each other, then the dog bounded over and commenced cleaning the drops off our faces, which was rather funny."
Moody stated the focus was staying in the present.
"There is no solution and that is why you have to be extremely strongly focused on just accepting and appreciating all aspects now," he said.
"According to Annie, we've been very lucky that the only real determination I made when I left playing was to devote as much period with the kids as possible. We won't recover those years back."
Sportsman Connection
Top-level competitors are unevenly affected by MND, with investigations proposing the rate of the illness is up to six times greater than in the wider community.
It is thought that by limiting the O2 obtainable and creating injury to motor neurone cells, consistent, strenuous physical activity can activate the illness in those already predisposed.
Sports Playing Days
Moody, who won 71 England caps and competed with the British and Irish Lions in New Zealand in 2005, was dubbed 'Mad Dog' during his sports career, in acknowledgment of his courageous, relentless approach to the game.
He participated through a bone injury of his leg for a duration with Leicester and once caused a training-ground altercation with fellow player and friend Martin Johnson when, annoyed, he left a tackle pad and began throwing himself into physical contacts.
After appearing as a replacement in the Rugby World Cup decisive match win over Australia in 2003, he secured a ball at the rear of the throw-in in the critical passage of play, setting a base for half-back Matt Dawson to attack and Jonny Wilkinson to kick the game-deciding drop-goal.
Assistance System
Moody has previously told Johnson, who led England to that victory, and a couple of other ex- players about his diagnosis, but the others will be finding out his news with the broader public.
"There will be a period when we'll need to depend on their assistance but, at the moment, just having that kind of affection and acceptance that people are there is the crucial thing," he stated.
"The sport is such a excellent group.
"I said to the kids the other day, I've had an incredible life.
"Even when it concluded now, I've valued all of it and welcomed all of it and got to do it with exceptional people.
"When you have the opportunity to label your enthusiasm your career, it's one of the greatest blessings.
"Achieving this for so long a time with the squads that I did it with was a joy. And I know they will want to support in whatever way they can and I look forward to having those talks."
